Suckas! Someone got punk'd.
Saturday came and went as usual. Except it got hot outside again. I worked the tour, I drank some beers, I went out. No one disappeared. No earthquakes. Just drinks and dancing and a lost ID... if anyone sees it (probably on the ground outside Dawg Gone Good BBQ or somewhere between there and Little Kings), bring it on over, please!
Besides dancing like an idiot and drinking to excess (what's new?) on Saturday, I went to the Melting Point and saw the Crash Test Dummies. Remember them? I will say, it was pretty good. And Brad Roberts is pretty funny. Of course they played Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm in their encore. Shows there are neat because it's so small. I've never felt that it's so crowded there that should there be a tipped candle or some poorly-engineered pyrotechnics, I would be that girl who makes it to the door but ends up getting crushed by the crowd behind me against the doorframe. So that's good.
I wonder how many people called out of work on Friday with the belief they were going to be heading 'home' on Saturday? "Hi, Mr. Bossman. This is Sherry. I won't be coming into work today because I have a few things I need to square away before tomorrow's Rapture. Sorry for the inconvenience! I'm pretty sure Brad can cover for me, since he's a gay and all and will not be taken into Heaven... Oh, and I guess I won't be there on Monday, either. Or ever again. Thanks! Hopefully I'll see you soon!". And now what? I suppose those folks will have to go slouching in tomorrow morning with their tails between their legs. "Oh yeah that... my bad. I'll make up the hours."
OR.... maybe I and all my nonbeliever friends are wrong. Maybe there is a god, and maybe the Rapture really did happen. Maybe the only ones taken up were a handful of recluse-types living in the woods and staying the hell out of civilization's way. Who would notice they were gone? Or maybe, just maybe, God thought about it a little and decided He'd rather not give one single person a backstage pass to Paradise. Perhaps the human race, as a whole, has been deemed unworthy. After all, collectively we are selfish, manipulative, ignorant, judgmental asshats with a propensity to destroy our Earthly home, shoot each other over tennis shoes and iPods, start wars over differences in culture or ancestry, and just generally Fuck Shit Up. Maybe this is why we can't have nice things. If this is the case, I totally don't blame Him... I wouldn't let us in, either. First thing that would happen would be the construction of a Wal-Mart. God knows this, of course. So maybe He looked around as his beautiful kingdom, free of douchebaggery and fast-food chains and NASCAR, and said "Fuck that".
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