I just got back from North Carolina. I went up to vist my grandmother because my grandfather died on Monday. There wasn't a service of any sort, so it was just family being together. We basically sat around the house doing nothing for two days, which could be nice, but was actually really boring.
What made it so awkward is that the members of my family are not close at all. I talk to only my mother on a regular basis. Regular meaning at least once every 2 months. Sometimes I would get emails from my grandmother, and would write back, and never get a reply. My aunt Jewel (she had it legally changed from 'Julie' a while back) who lives in Niagra Falls was there, and I haven't seen her in at least 7 years, and have maybe spoken to her twice in that time. The other two aunts live in Cincinnati; Beth and Joanna. When I was little I used to talk to Beth a lot. I saw her over Thanksgiving for the first time in years. And there is no regular contact anymore. Joanna I never had any sort of relationship with, and have only seen her at a few family gatherings like this one. Also, some of the aunts/sisters don't really get along, so they don't talk to each other either. So, you get a house full of people who only know the goings-on in the other people's lives because of what they hear through the family grapevine. No on actually knows each other anymore. (And none of them know me at all...) And unfortunately it seems as if no one really cares either. Which means two days of small talk and banter and yapping about some TV show everyone watches. I think it is a shame, and is something I hope to avoid should I ever have my own family. Hopefully I'll be able to break that cycle, though, since that type of family (the not-close-at-all one) is mostly what I've always had.
What made it so awkward is that the members of my family are not close at all. I talk to only my mother on a regular basis. Regular meaning at least once every 2 months. Sometimes I would get emails from my grandmother, and would write back, and never get a reply. My aunt Jewel (she had it legally changed from 'Julie' a while back) who lives in Niagra Falls was there, and I haven't seen her in at least 7 years, and have maybe spoken to her twice in that time. The other two aunts live in Cincinnati; Beth and Joanna. When I was little I used to talk to Beth a lot. I saw her over Thanksgiving for the first time in years. And there is no regular contact anymore. Joanna I never had any sort of relationship with, and have only seen her at a few family gatherings like this one. Also, some of the aunts/sisters don't really get along, so they don't talk to each other either. So, you get a house full of people who only know the goings-on in the other people's lives because of what they hear through the family grapevine. No on actually knows each other anymore. (And none of them know me at all...) And unfortunately it seems as if no one really cares either. Which means two days of small talk and banter and yapping about some TV show everyone watches. I think it is a shame, and is something I hope to avoid should I ever have my own family. Hopefully I'll be able to break that cycle, though, since that type of family (the not-close-at-all one) is mostly what I've always had.
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